Baked Fries That Don't Suck!

If I were a zombie, my primary food moan would be, "Chicckkkpppeeeeaaaaassssss," obviously. But a little further down my food moan list would be, "Frrriiieeeesssssssssss." I love french fries, but I am scared to death of deep frying anything. I fear I will either burn my house down or melt my flesh, so I have tried repeatedly to make baked fries. If you have tried, you may have noticed that they tend to be soggy-ish. But, I have discovered a top secret tip for making fresh fries without them having a case of the suck. Chill, beeches. I will get to it soon enough. In the mean time, I will bore you with minutia so you are forced to stay here longer. HAHAHAH.  It's all part of my evil scheme. For what? I have no fucking clue. It isn't like I get paid for doing this blog. 

So, maybe you're thinking to yourself that you could just go to a coney island or some such local grease pit and get some good fries. Yeah, I guess you could. But, then, what would be the purpose of looking up baked fries on the internet? Huh? Yeah....I thought so. Plus, you couldn't brag to your pals that you made some kickass fries in your oven instead of at some grease pit where the line cooks spit in your food and tinkle in the soup. Or whatever. Ew, man. Just make them yourself.

I don't have some fancy fry cutter, but you may. In which case, by all means, use it. I just used a really sharp chef's knife to cut my potatoes into fry size strips. You could wedge them, though I'd recommend rather slim wedges. But, again, whatever. It's your ass on the line if they don't turn out. I tried to tell you what to do. SO, anyway, the potatoes are cut. One to the recipe. I made mine garlicky, of course, but you could really add in any spice you want. Be creative. Or not. I don't care.

This makes enough for 3-4 sides.

Ingredients:

• 3 Idaho potatoes, peeled and cut into fries (or wedges if you insist)
• 2 TB olive oil or canola oil
• 4 cloves garlic roughly diced, not quite a mince...slightly larger
• salt and some pepper
• cooking spray

Method:

1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F. Move a rack to the lowest setting in oven.Get a large baking sheet and spray lightly with cooking oil.
2. Put cut potatoes in a large bowl. Cover with extremely HOT water for 10 minutes.
3. While the potatoes are in the water, heat a small skillet over medium heat. Add oil and heat for 2 minutes. Then turn to med-low and add garlic (or any other spices you want). When it starts to yellow and turn brown at the edges, remove pan from heat. I stirred occasionally so the garlic oils mingled with all of the cooking oil. At least that is my theory. 
4. Now, pour out the water. Put the potatoes on paper towel and dry well. I added a layer of paper towel on top and rolled it all around until the potatoes were dry. Go ahead and dry out the bowl you just used. Now add the potatoes back to the bowl. 
5. Pour the oil on the potatoes and toss/stir well to coat. Spread the fries out on the baking sheet in a single layer. Sprinkle with large salt (I used kosher) and some pepper.
6. Put in oven for about 15 minutes. Use a spatula and shake the fries around. Then bake another 10-15 minutes, or until the fries are browned to your liking. I took mine out and they crisped a bit more as they cooled.